Same Old Drag

Time: 09:36 pm
Current mood: Somewhere out there
Listening to: In The Ghetto by Elvis Preseley

I wrote an ad called ‘Life happens’.

Everyday is a groundhog day.

And everyday I want to go to bed feeling better than when I woke up.

Nothing to look forward to.

Question?

Time: 02:55 pm
Current mood: Given Up
Listening to: This Could Be My Last Day by Duke Special

I don't understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don't do it. I’m at war with my mind.

I don’t know what is legitimate, and what’s delusional anymore.

But then there are times when I think I’m ill because of the kink in my brain.

There’s got to be an answer somewhere.

Now and Then

Time: 12:22 pm
Current mood: Getting there but not giving up
Listening to: Dark Road by Richard Hawley

I feel like I was more loveable before I got into my mid 20's.

Then my mood wasn't quite as up and down as it is now. Now I made myself more unlikable, unlovable.

I hope there’s a better tomorrow for me.

2+2 = 5

Time: 11:48 am
Current mood: Too sad to describe
Listening to: Girl From The Northern States by The Young Republic

I feel like I am trying to sail a boat in a hurricane.

Life is floating. Life needs a break — from me.

Thinking of suicide seems to have a calming effect.

How ironic?

Mini me

Time: 12:10 pm
Current mood: Bouncing ball
Listening to: Lord, I'm Discouraged by The Hold Steady

Some compulsive thought in the back of my head can override my very essence at will.

I know there’s no greener grass than that on which I sit.

But that doesn’t stop this weird creature in my head from whispering at me almost constantly, “Get out, you have much bigger things to accomplish”.

But finding a place of real feeling is impossibly hard.

Sink or Swim!

Time: 11:40 pm
Current mood: Was okay 5 minutes ago, now very very sad
Listening to: Going to a Town by Rufus Wainwright

Is treading water really better than drowning?

Most mornings I feel as if i woke up from the wrong side of the bed.

My life is temperamental. When it's good, it's heavenly.

Bullseye!

Time: 10:43 pm
Current mood: In between
Listening to: Hljomalind by Sigur Ros

Every time I think I have found a way to deal, life changes.

Unfortunately it is not so easy to get the genie back in the bottle.

I need to stay focussed.